Gift-Giving and Hyphens

My usual weekend plan of being with Sophia changed Friday night. Due to a stress-induced cold (body aches, icky dreams, restless nights), I was unable to accompany Thomas down to Fresno. A cold may not seem like a huge deal, but Tom's mother gets sick easily. And when she does, it usually results in pneumonia.

So I stayed in San Jose.

I expected to be too down in the dumps to knit. It's an odd thing how my emotions affect my knitting. When I'm upset or sad, my arms feel very heavy. Too heavy to pick up even the smallest of projects.

However, quite the opposite happened.

The glimmer of hope came late Friday night. Thomas had already left for Fresno, and yet my arms did not feel like cinder blocks were tied to them. So I awoke Saturday morning with the intention of growing this little spark into a flame. Shortly after waking up, I remembered out loud:

Oh yes, I ordered a skein of yarn from Minnehaha Fiber Works. I wonder if it's on its way.

I checked the status of said yarn, and to my delight, the package had already arrived. As if a new skein of wool wasn't enough to brighten my day, the owners of Minnehaha (Pamala and Heidi) included a personalized note with wonderful words of encouragement.

This yarn was hand-dyed by Pamala and Heidi using black walnuts, and it came with a pattern for boot cuffs worked with double-pointed needles. The ladies said this was a speedy knit, and they weren't kidding. The cuffs worked up so quickly that my hands wanted more double-pointed needle fun.

So I got to work casting on for a pair of Manly Mitts. (The recipient of these wrist-warmers is married to the soon-owner of the boot cuffs. I will not say who these wonderful people are, as they may be reading this.)

After completing the ribbing of wrist-warmer number one, and taking detailed notes--as I often think I'll remember for number two and never do--I continued with my double-pointed needle kick by working on the sleeves of a top for my mum.

In the midst of this double-pointed needle frenzy, I spent snippets of time on a gift for Sophia. It seemed obvious to work on a Sophia Present during a weekend that I was originally going to spend with her.

This patchwork of knitted fabric will be a blanket. She specifically asked for one for Christmas. It looks a mess, and I love it. Like other knitters, I have been hanging on to many yarn remnants. They're too big to throw away, but too small to be anything significant. So they can all be something significant together. If this Franken-Blanket turns out remotely the way it looks in my head, I am certain Sophia will love it as well.

I realized this weekend that I focused very little on The SweaterVest as a shop and more on Kate as a knitter. The result was something more significant than a sale of a garment. The connections I've made with fellow artists, knitters, and fiber-enthusiasts is so much bigger than what The SweaterVest will ever become.

Work and Play

Sometimes I take out my projects just to look at them.

It's been awhile since I've had the chance to really add on to my knitting. My nanny-life is keeping me pretty busy. 

This is a good thing.

I like that I can always come back to knitting. Like nannying, it is a constant in my life. I feel low when I go days without working a few rows, similar to how I get down when I go days without seeing kids.

But just because I haven't worked on anything in weeks doesn't mean I'm not a knitter. It doesn't mean I'm not an artist.

Same Fibers, Different Cities

Whenever I visit a different city, I have this urge to seek out yarn shops. I certainly don't need to add to my stash. And thanks to my most recent yard-sale find, I don't even need tools.

While riding Caltrain up to Milbrae (to catch BART to get to SFO to get on a plane to go to New York), I had a realization and shared it with Tom:

I haven't even been to knitting stores in San Francisco.

He chuckled and shook his head at me.

And yet, he still gave in to my whims.

He's a keeper.

The first store I visited was The Argyle Yarn Shop in Park Slope. It was lovely.

I purchased one skein of Quince&Co. Sparrow in colourway Port. This will be added to my Leafy Shawl.

Of course, Purl Soho was a must-see.

I'll admit, I was very giddy when we got off the subway in Soho. And after walking into the shop, my breath was taken away. 

It is, no doubt, aesthetically pleasing. 

The colours are brilliant, it is a very large store with high ceilings, and they have all kinds of textiles. If I lived in Soho, had lots of money, and was experienced in things other than knitting, it would definitely be a one-stop shop for all of my artsy needs. 

A funny thing I was reminded of, though, while in New York: most yarn stores are the same. There are very few fibers at Purl Soho that I can't find at Green Planet in Campbell. 

I think that's why I make such an event out of my yarn travels. I like the idea of visiting a place that is familiar.

Summer Summary

Thomas and I had a quick trip to Fresno yesterday. Sadly, our last summer week with Sophia ended, and it was time for her to go back to the heat of the Central Valley before school starts.

Things we did: camped near Fresno, celebrated our birthdays, saw a baseball game, hiked in Los Gatos, went to the train museum in Sacramento, watched fireworks in downtown San Jose, went to the Boardwalk in Santa Cruz, worked on some art at home.

 

I am totally in love with this kid.

Her last night with us, she wanted to learn how to knit.

I'm okay with this. 

I quit my job

I wanted a break, so I quit my job. At the worst time ever.

I made a mistake. A selfish one.

Being unemployed is taking its toll on me. When I worked 45-50 hours/week, I often felt that if I had more time I could work harder on The SweaterVest. Knit more. Make more. Do more. But generating very little income brings me down. Way down.

I did have a small glimmer of light this morning. Probably because I had a few hours of work to look forward to. I am learning that this balance is what fuels me. When I have work, I am more motivated to create things. I had all of Monday and Tuesday to devote to The SweaterVest, yet I did more knitting and planning today than I did on Monday and Tuesday combined.

I have realized that when money is tight, it is important to let the light in. Even when my bank account is tapped out, I have always had something to fall back on. And I am beyond grateful for that.

I'm really not poor. I live in the Bay Area, I make good money (when I'm not making stupid choices), and I have an amazing boyfriend. I have family close by. It's baseball season, and I don't need to have the cable bill paid to know how well (or how bad) the Giants are doing. We have plenty of books. And of course, yarn. We have a car that runs well. And even if that fails us, we have two pretty fantastic bikes.

I am not completely out of luck.

Though, luck is wearing thin. And it is important to recognize that this is indeed luck. No more mistakes.

I cannot go back in time. That may sound like a cop-out, but it's true. I cannot change what I have already done. I can only do what is in front of me. Clean the kitchen. Make some food. Go for a walk. A run. A bike ride. Knit. Read. Drink coffee. Find a balance. It is terrifying how peaceful, how natural, things become, when it is the only thing left to do.

House-Sitting and Shawls

I have been house-sitting for my dad and step-mom, Lolita, for the last week. 

I lived here with my dad and Lo for a short period of time after my divorce and before moving in with Thomas, so it's like a second home. 

Gray Cat and Black Cat are great company.

  

I started working on this shawl the other day.

The pattern is one that I knit a few years ago. For Lolita.

I have a sort of love-hate relationship with Lolita's shawl. 

First off, it was a kit I purchased from Knit Picks. I was still a pretty new knitter at the time. I couldn't understand why anyone would spend more money at the local yarn store down the street when one could easily attain boxes of mass-produced yarn online. 

// In later blog-posts, I will get into more detail of the importance of buying locally. For now, think of it like food: You can easily purchase conventionally grown fruits and vegetables from SafeWay (or Vons, for my Fresno friends), or you can support your local farmers, buy organic produce, milk from happy cows, etc. //  

Another bummer about the shawl is that the pattern had a few issues. There were mistakes in the first chart, so the website put out an errata to remedy the situation. Unfortunately, the errata also had errors.   

Third, shawls grow. Constantly. Every other row, stitches are added to the garment. This means, every other row, minutes are added. By the time I was at the end of Lolita's shawl, it took me about an hour to get through one row.

On the plus side, I ended up with one of the most beautiful garments I had ever completed. And Lolita loves it. After blocking the piece, I told myself that I would probably never make another shawl ever again. 

So here I am. Starting another shawl.

  

With Gray Cat by my side.

The Office

This is where I knit. 

When I work here, this corner is my office. When it's mealtime, it is the dining room. And when this area isn't being used, it is simply a table in the corner of our bedroom. 

It is my favourite room in our apartment.

When I think about growth, it isn't usually something as simple as getting up and opening the blinds. But within the last few weeks, I have come to appreciate the morning light coming through these windows. I have realized that this table has provided a space for me. It has given me the ability to continue to grow in the craft that I have been so blessed to be part of. 

Sitting down with a pair of needles and a ball of yarn is a wonderful feeling. But being able to sit down with my notebook, a cup of coffee, and my latest knitting project feels so empowering. *Knit a few rows, sip some coffee, write down my thoughts. Repeat from * .

  I can get used to this.

 Of course, this space isn't all about cups of coffee and luxury yarns. Like I said, this is my office. Where I work. Along with that stillness in the quiet morning comes a sense of responsibility. When I begin treating my art as my job, that is when my work has the best results. 

It's time for me to be bold. It's time to start taking my business -- my talent, my passion -- seriously. It's time I put some worth in the work that I have accomplished.